So I woke up Friday, and from the moment I stepped out of my bed, I just felt weird. I felt burdened. I felt insignificant. The morning just wasn't a good start to my day. I was rushing around the house doing this and that all morning, and ended up not making time for my morning devotions before heading to work -- that never works out for my benefit. I'm not going to bore you with details of the day. But the feelings of Friday moved into Saturday, and then Sunday, and then even Monday. In fact, Kodi and I had the pleasure of visiting a really incredible church in Bath, OH on Sunday. If you live near that area, I highly recommend checking out Grace Church. Apparently it was a great message; one that I needed to hear -- it was a reminder to stop taking the safe Christian route and to step out in faith and see how God uses you. And yet my heart felt so heavy and my mind was so fogged up by crap that Satan is feeding me, that none of the pastor's words seemed to reach my heart.
The devil tries to feed us these lies that we are not capable of being used by God. For me personally, he tries to tell me that I've wasted too many years of my life being a lazy Christian -- that I am not in any position to make any big strides in furthering Christ's kingdom. I woke up on Friday and had this overwhelming feeling of that, for example, this blog was a big waste of time. I felt like I have not done enough in my life for people to care about or take seriously what I think and feel regarding faith. I suddenly was sucked dry of all emotion and passion. I felt worthless. I let the devil have the upper-hand. I think you and I both realize, though, that we can not be discouraged by the lies that Satan tries to overwhelm us with. Our focus must remain on God and furthering His kingdom, whether through big or small means.
The devil tries to feed us these lies that we are not capable of being used by God. For me personally, he tries to tell me that I've wasted too many years of my life being a lazy Christian -- that I am not in any position to make any big strides in furthering Christ's kingdom. I woke up on Friday and had this overwhelming feeling of that, for example, this blog was a big waste of time. I felt like I have not done enough in my life for people to care about or take seriously what I think and feel regarding faith. I suddenly was sucked dry of all emotion and passion. I felt worthless. I let the devil have the upper-hand. I think you and I both realize, though, that we can not be discouraged by the lies that Satan tries to overwhelm us with. Our focus must remain on God and furthering His kingdom, whether through big or small means.
I'm thinking about leading a small group at school. I have been praying about it for a while. And the more I pray and think about it, the more the devil feeds me the idea that there is no way I can try to lead people at school. He tells me, "Laura, you know how you get. School is going to start and you are going to end up consumed by studying like you always do. This little 'phase' you are in is not gonna last, so stop now before you make a fool of yourself." Obviously, that is not God speaking to me. I am praying now that I can not only distinguish in my mind what God is speaking to me from what the Devil is trying to deceive me with, but I also need to be able to distinguish it in my heart -- not let the Devil's lies bring me down in spirit.
In that book I keep bringing up, it talks about being on Satan's Hit List -- being the kind of believer that he hates and is afraid of. That may sound like a scary thought, but if we embrace Christ, we have nothing to fear. Isaiah 41:10 "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." I realize that the more I align my life with Christ's, the more Satan is going to try to mess with me and feed me lies. But that is okay because, again, the Bible is full or reminders that we don't have to be afraid when we have God on our side:
Psalm 5:12 "For surely, O LORD, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield."
Psalm 9:9-10 "The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you"
Please pray for me. I feel like the Lord is really working on me now -- preparing me for big plans he has in my future. Pray that I don't get discouraged by the fact that with every few strides I make that lead me in His direction, Satan seems to be trying to drag me back a step or two. Making the process daunting and emotionally exhausting at times. Pray that I stay focused on His mission for me. And I hope that if you face this same battle, I can offer encouragement to you as well. Because like I've said, we can't work through this faith journey on our own.
In that book I keep bringing up, it talks about being on Satan's Hit List -- being the kind of believer that he hates and is afraid of. That may sound like a scary thought, but if we embrace Christ, we have nothing to fear. Isaiah 41:10 "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." I realize that the more I align my life with Christ's, the more Satan is going to try to mess with me and feed me lies. But that is okay because, again, the Bible is full or reminders that we don't have to be afraid when we have God on our side:
Psalm 5:12 "For surely, O LORD, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield."
Psalm 9:9-10 "The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you"
Please pray for me. I feel like the Lord is really working on me now -- preparing me for big plans he has in my future. Pray that I don't get discouraged by the fact that with every few strides I make that lead me in His direction, Satan seems to be trying to drag me back a step or two. Making the process daunting and emotionally exhausting at times. Pray that I stay focused on His mission for me. And I hope that if you face this same battle, I can offer encouragement to you as well. Because like I've said, we can't work through this faith journey on our own.
K thanks for reading. Grace and peace♥
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