attitude is everything

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, the education, the money, than circumstances, than failure, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company... a church... a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice everyday regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past... we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it. And so it is with you... we are in charge of our attitudes.”  - Charles Swindoll

I know it is a long quote, but I love it. This may not be a verse from the Bible, but I am certain that God uses the simplest of quotes, experiences, thoughts, stories, etc to speak to you and me.

Attitude is something that has gotten the best of me many times in my life. I allow myself to be “bogged down” by the things I face throughout my day, and I find myself focusing on and allowing the negative aspects of my life to overshadow the positive. There are so many positives in my life: I have a wonderful husband, siblings, parents, and friends. I belong to a loving and powerful Savior who cares deeply about every detail of my life.  I live in an adorable little farmhouse. I have spent my summer weekends surrounded by family at my favorite place in the world – Beulah Beach. I only have 1 semester left in my college career. I am healthy and blessed in so many ways - the list goes on and on. I need to choose to have a positive attitude throughout my days; one exuding happiness, contentment, and passion.

Right now, Kodi and I are experiencing a stage in our lives where we feel stuck -- trapped in a mundane routine. Kodi has been so exhausted from his job lately. And since we got married, I have focused so much on the day that we move on to “bigger and better things;” being a fifth year senior has been highly discouraging for me lately. And we let those individual circumstances really bring us down as a couple. We realized the other day that we have spent the last two weeks so detached from each other. Our conversations consisted of complaining about the day we had, and the day we face tomorrow. And it sucked us dry of any and all passion. Our love towards each other was barely apparent at times. And even as the Lord has been revealing so many wonderful things to me lately, my bad attitude served as a blockade to His blessings.

This quote has really served as a kick in the gut. It has reminded me that many things will happen in life, planned and unexpected, good and bad, exciting and mundane … I have to choose what attitude I will have toward those things because "happiness is a choice that requires effort at times." And if I can be steer clear of being self-absorbed and caught up in a pity party, and instead choose to glorify God by reacting positively, then my life, Kodi’s life, and the lives of those close to us will reap the benefits. Blessings and joy will be apparent in a transforming way; each day will bring a renewed spirit.  That sounds like a worthwhile notion to me! 

Okay, so this is kinda random, but I wanted to include it because watching it puts the biggest smile on my face.  This little girl has the whole positive attitude thing down pat -- perhaps a little too much! lol Check it out:
Jessica's Daily Affirmation

So please pray for Kodi and me.  Pray that our hearts and minds would be overwhelmed by all the ways the Lord has blessed us.  Pray that we would take charge of our attitudes and choose to be positive in a way that builds ourselves, each other, and others up.  Pray that I stop dwelling on the so-called "bigger and better" things of our future and that I find contentment and joy in the here and now.  Because this is an area of my life that the Lord has placed on my heart -- revealing that it needs serious adjusment as I work to fullfil His will for me. 

K thanks for reading.  Grace and peace♥

facts behind my faith

So I recently got the chance to get together with my dearest friends from high school. We had a blast catching up on our current lives and sharing a bunch of laughs. I love those girls so much!  It was pretty awesome because we somehow got on the topic of faith for quite some time. The conversation actually lasted for at least an hour, so we talked about a lot of things. As I shared about our need for Jesus, His gift of salvation, and His transforming power in my life, a lot of questions came up. Questions about the validity of the Bible. Questions about why Christianity is any "better" than any other religion. Questions about the existance of Heaven and Hell. LOTS of questions. And I appreciate so much that these came up. I gave the best answers I could in that moment, but at the end of the conversation, I realized I have SO MUCH to learn. 

If I want to truly stand for Jesus, shouldn't I have the facts and evidence behind exactly what I stand for? Giving general answers to questions about faith isn't going to have the same impact as a clear-cut response.  Although it is not about convincing people to accept Christ as their savior, having the facts can only help to lead them in that direction.  I'm not saying that I think God demands that we all be distinguished scholars on the history of the Bible and Christianity, and so forth.  But I do think that working to know such details is just one more way to serve and glorify Him.  And for some, I believe it might be a necessity in order to be better prepared for carrying out His will. What do you think?  So yea, for me personally, I feel that although the relationship with Christ is the most important factor, knowing the facts is a very useful tool in furthering that relationship and sharing about it with others. I want to have cut and dry evidence behind why I am confident that the Bible is true and breathed by God.  I want to have valid proof that eternity exists beyond our 80+ years on earth.  I want to have reasons why faith can't be relative -- Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me." --  I wanna be able to prove that unmistakably.  I have spent the last several days taking this personal challenge very seriously, and I am loving all that I have learned.


Peter's encouragment in 1 Peter motivates me in this area ... "But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect" (1 Peter 3:15).  I know many are familiar with that verse, but in reality, how often are we truly ready to give the reason for the hope we have? ... the reason that demonstrates that it isn't this so called "blind" faith. 

I am encouraged right now to keep searching for how I can grow in my faith and be used by God, and this is just one of the ways that I feel He has laid on my heart.  I encourage you to search out some ways, as well.  Once I have better sorted through the things that I am learning through my studies, I intend to share some of it with you.  Like I said, I believe that knowing these things and having evidence for what we believe, not only serves to better prepare us for sharing about Christ with others, but it can only help us grow stronger in our own walk with Him.  What do you think?

K thanks for reading.  Grace and peace♥

"Well done my good and faithful servant."

So earlier this summer, I heard a missionary speak at a conference I was at. Besides the fact that this missionary was hilarious, and rather entertaining to listen to, he asked a single question that has since then, resonated with me daily. He asked, "When you are finally face to face with our Savior, which would you rather hear: 'Welcome home," or "Well done my good and faithful servant"? Sure, "Welcome home" is pleasant and inviting. But to hear those other 7 words from the creator of this incredible universe ... now that would be freakin unbelievable! As Christians, we have the choice of receiving either greeting. We can live this comfortable and conservative life, simply accepting His salvation and obeying His commandments so that when we leave this earth, we are welcomed at the gates of Heaven. Or we can step out in our faith, take risks to further His kingdom, and let Him use us in ways we never thought possible for ourselves. Living in a "radical" way might lead to some uncomfortable experiences. It might lead to someone or some people thinking I am kinda odd, but this particular verse serves as a clear-cut reminder for me of how much that matters:

Galations 1:10 "Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ."

Let people think I have gone off the deepend when I share about my incredible Savior.  I love this quote from the book I always talk about, "Jesus is perfect, loved everyone perfectly, and STILL got nailed to a cross!"  No matter what we do, there will always be people who don't accept us.  It's time we stop worrying about everyone's opinion, and instead, focus on pleasing our matchless Savior -- the only one who will never think we are odd and certainly never stop loving us -- the perfect creator who gave us this very life that we live.  As I take that risk, I am glorifying Him through showing eternal value to another soul that He created. I am building up the reward in heaven that awaits me, and I'm setting myself up for the most incredible greeting from God when I am one day standing before Him. It's gonna be worth it! 

K thanks for reading. Grace and peace♥

Satan's Hit List

So I woke up Friday, and from the moment I stepped out of my bed, I just felt weird.  I felt burdened. I felt insignificant.  The morning just wasn't a good start to my day.  I was rushing around the house doing this and that all morning, and ended up not making time for my morning devotions before heading to work -- that never works out for my benefit.  I'm not going to bore you with details of the day.  But the feelings of Friday moved into Saturday, and then Sunday, and then even Monday.  In fact, Kodi and I had the pleasure of visiting a really incredible church in Bath, OH on Sunday.  If you live near that area, I highly recommend checking out Grace Church.  Apparently it was a great message; one that I needed to hear -- it was a reminder to stop taking the safe Christian route and to step out in faith and see how God uses you.  And yet my heart felt so heavy and my mind was so fogged up by crap that Satan is feeding me, that none of the pastor's words seemed to reach my heart. 

The devil tries to feed us these lies that we are not capable of being used by God.  For me personally, he tries to tell me that I've wasted too many years of my life being a lazy Christian -- that I am not in any position to make any big strides in furthering Christ's kingdom.  I woke up on Friday and had this overwhelming feeling of that, for example, this blog was a big waste of time.  I felt like I have not done enough in my life for people to care about or take seriously what I think and feel regarding faith.  I suddenly was sucked dry of all emotion and passion.  I felt worthless.  I let the devil have the upper-hand.  I think you and I both realize, though, that we can not be discouraged by the lies that Satan tries to overwhelm us with.  Our focus must remain on God and furthering His kingdom, whether through big or small means.

I'm thinking about leading a small group at school.  I have been praying about it for a while.  And the more I pray and think about it, the more the devil feeds me the idea that there is no way I can try to lead people at school.  He tells me, "Laura, you know how you get.  School is going to start and you are going to end up consumed by studying like you always do.  This little 'phase' you are in is not gonna last, so stop now before you make a fool of yourself."  Obviously, that is not God speaking to me.  I am praying now that I can not only distinguish in my mind what God is speaking to me from what the Devil is trying to deceive me with, but I also need to be able to distinguish it in my heart -- not let the Devil's lies bring me down in spirit.

In that book I keep bringing up, it talks about being on Satan's Hit List -- being the kind of believer that he hates and is afraid of.  That may sound like a scary thought, but if we embrace Christ, we have nothing to fear. Isaiah 41:10 "Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."  I realize that the more I align my life with Christ's, the more Satan is going to try to mess with me and feed me lies.  But that is okay because, again, the Bible is full or reminders that we don't have to be afraid when we have God on our side:

Psalm 5:12 "For surely, O LORD, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield."

Psalm 9:9-10 "The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you"

Please pray for me.  I feel like the Lord is really working on me now -- preparing me for big plans he has in my future.  Pray that I don't get discouraged by the fact that with every few strides I make that lead me in His direction, Satan seems to be trying to drag me back a step or two.  Making the process daunting and emotionally exhausting at times.  Pray that I stay focused on His mission for me.  And I hope that if you face this same battle, I can offer encouragement to you as well.  Because like I've said, we can't work through this faith journey on our own. 

K thanks for reading. Grace and peace♥

 

HIS plans will prevail

Since I was a little kid, I have known the verse "'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future'" (Jeremiah 29:11). And yet, I still have struggled with giving up complete control of my plans and future to Christ and His will for me. In my mind, I would say "Christ, I trust you entirely in this circumstance," but in my heart, I was still holding on to the fact that if I just did this ... or that ... then what I want has a better chance of happening. Take for example me applying to grad school. I spent a few weeks this summer studying for this test (the mcat) that I was convinced controlled my destiny. I had to get a 20 on it to even be considered for Case Western's Anesthesiologist Assistant program. I worried myself to tears over that test. Throughout my studying, I began to build confidence -- I was getting pretty descent scores on practice tests. Turns out ... I got a 22. A 22!!-- Woohoo -- that's good enough to apply to Case!! You would think that would have been my response, but instead I was confused and unsatisfied. I thought to myself ..."Why only a 22? I did way better than that on practice tests!?!" This was absolutely a self-centered prideful moment.


Well, I was recently working my way through Proverbs, and I came across these verses:
Proverbs 19:21
"You can make many plans, but the Lord's purpose will prevail."

Proverbs 20:14
"The Lord directs our steps, so why try to understand everything along the way?"

Proverbs 21:30
"No human wisdom, or understanding, or plan can stand against the Lord."


God's timing is funny. and perfect. Those verses nailed down the reality that yes, 'He does know the plans he has for me,' but more importantly ... if I choose to seek and follow God's will, whatever alternative plans I create for myself won't stand a chance if they aren't a part of His master plan.  If I strive to stay at the center of His will, he will continue to direct my every step as His wonderful plan is fulfilled.  So plain and simple. Stop trying to have control, Laura. I'll only end up like a hamster that spends all day exhausting itself in one of those lil wheels, while it never ends up going anywhere.  Instead, I need to simply stay focused on HIM and trust in what He has in store for me. 
So I could have gotten a 34 on my mcat (woot woot, go Mare!), but if God doesn't want me to be at Case Western, than that 34 won't do squat for me. Perhaps God plans to place me at a school out of state where I have an opportunity to have a major impact in a specific nonbeliever's life. Or perhaps he does plan for me to go to Case, and he was simply using my mcat score as a reminder that I need to trust in him every step of the way -- no need to question or try to understand it all -- His plan will prevail. Or perhaps God doesn't even want me to be an Anesthesiologist Assistant, even if that is what I want, because he has bigger things in store for me (and Kodi). It's SO FREEING to accept that not only does He know the plans, but they are His plans for me ... not my own ... so I can give up worry and control. As I said, I just have an open mind and heart that is seeking His will -- and he will continue to reveal what He has in cards for me.


Pray for me that I continue to find peace in this.


K thanks for reading. Grace and peace♥

why I share this blog

So I don't share this blog with people so that they will think, "Wow. Look at you go Laura" (not sure if ppl still use the phrase "look at you go"-- but I do. lol) I share it because I need a lot of wisdom, help, encouragement, prayers and support from others. And I share it because I hope that at some point, my rambling or someone's response to it might offer someone else the wisdom, help, encouragement, prayers and support that they need. So always feel free to comment, whether you agree, disagree, or had some sort of epiphany bc of the post [pretty sure you don’t have to have a blog account to comment or follow someone].


I can't figure all of this out on my own ... I don't want to. I totally endorse the verses "Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing" (1 Thessalonians 5:11) and "As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend" (Proverbs 27:17). I want and need to be in touch with people who make me think. People who challenge me to back up my faith and start living it out more. People that encourage me to keep searching for His will. People that will pray for me on this journey. We all need this -- even if we’ve got a good grasp on things. And I wanna be that person for you, so never hesitate to contact me -- whether by email, facebook, phone, blogging … whatever. :)


Grace and peace my friends♥

sinful nature vs. the Spirit

So my brother and I have been emailing back and forth about what it looks like to be a believer or follower of Christ.  One thing I have wrestled with and brought up to him are the verses in Romans 10 that state, "9If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved."  To me, It doesn't seem like saying a lil prayer stating the Jesus is Lord and thanking him for dying on the cross for you is enough if you continue on living by your sinful nature.  What do you think?!  There have certainly been times in my life when I have lived in such a way -- just banked on the fact that because I asked Jesus to come into my heart at the age of four, then I could go on doing my own thing knowing that I would still end up in heaven some day.  Ya know ... I do not want to discredit our Savior's grace and sacrifice on the cross, but I am not convinced that living in such a way qualifies as being a believer in Christ who will one day be a part of His eternal kingdom.  Check out this excerpt from Romans.  It's long, but worth reading.

Romans 8:5-13
5Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires. 6The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace; 7the sinful mind is hostile to God. It does not submit to God's law, nor can it do so. 8Those controlled by the sinful nature cannot please God.
9You, however, are controlled not by the sinful nature but by the Spirit, if the Spirit of God lives in you. And if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he does not belong to Christ. 10But if Christ is in you, your body is dead because of sin, yet your spirit is alive because of righteousness. 11And if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit, who lives in you.
12Therefore, brothers, we have an obligation—but it is not to the sinful nature, to live according to it. 13For if you live according to the sinful nature, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.

To me, that kinda clears it up.  I am convinced that if we truly have accepted Christ's gift of grace and salvation and have a relationship with Him, then our lives will be transformed by the power of His Holy Spirit.  No longer will out actions and words and minds be controlled by our sinful nature.  That does not mean that we will not sin at all.  In fact, 1 John 5:18 says, "We know that God’s children do not make a practice of sinning, for God’s Son holds them securely, and the evil one cannot touch them."  I believer that there is a difference between sinning and making a practice of sinning. 

A believer does not know that going out on a Saturday and getting drunk is wrong and yet does it anyway.  That is practicing sin.

A believer does not choose to have sex with his or her bf/gf, even though they know it is wrong and feel condemned.  That is practicing sin.

A believer does not recognize that cheating on an exam is wrong, and yet goes ahead and does it.

I believe that someone who has the Holy Spirit in them is intentional about not sinning, although slip-ups will occur. And that individual desires Christ to work on their heart and mind in a way that protects them from getting caught up in the sinful things around them.   And although it may be a slow process to reaching that point, a believer goes to their Savior in prayer until they are strong enough to give up the sinful things of this world.  As my brother put it, "I think that if your life looks no different as a 'follower of Jesus' then it did before you became a 'follower'... then you are just a pretender. And you can't pretend with God because he knows your heart... it's all about your heart!"

My hope is that we can all start to really reflect on our lives and seek out how to align our actions and the desires of our hearts with what honors Him.  Please pray for me, personally, that my life can continue to be transformed by His Spirit through this process of learning to live a life of eternal value.  

K thanks for reading.  Grace and peace♥ 

One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven

 "I can guarantee that there is one thing you cannot do in heaven that you can do on earth.  You can worship God in heaven.  You can praise God in heaven.  You can sing songs to God in heaven.  You can learn God's Word in heaven.  But one thing you cannot do in heaven is share your faith with nonbelievers ... Since that is true, shouldn't it be a priority of your life to reach out to all the lost people on the earth while you can?"

That is an excerpt from the book I keep bringing up.  He's got a point, right?!

stepping into HIS comfort zone

So I had an amazing day with my dearest girlfriends yesterday. We spent the day boating and getting thrashed around on the water. Since we are all at that point where we soon part ways for grad school and careers and such, it was so wonderful to get to spend a whole day together – kinda like one of our last hurrahs for a while.  

 

On the ride back from the lake, we got into talking about witnessing. Although our Christian college experience was wonderful, we all agreed that it left us in somewhat of a bubble. For me personally, it has been over 4 years since I have last vocally shared my faith with someone because I felt like practically everyone around me at school already had a relationship with Christ.  In reality, had I taken the time to truly search out His will, I am convinced that I would have been led to plenty of Naz student's who were not believers.  Moreover, I have a number of friends of mine from my past that I know need our Savior. Yet, I am terrified to tell them about Him. I am afraid to risk rejection. I say … “I wanna wait until the timing is just right.” But the Bible straightforwardly contradicts that:

2 Timothy 4:2 “Preach the word of God. Be prepared, whether the time is favorable or not.”

We live in this world ruled by Satan, and it convinces us that it isn’t okay to “step on anyone’s toes” when it comes to “religion.” So instead, we play the card of “Well, I will share Christ with others through building relationships and being an example of Him,instead of making them uncomfortable by actually talking about salvation through Him.”  The Lord has really laid on my heart that I can’t rely on that anymore. I have to step out of my comfort zone, and step into HIS comfort zone if I am truly going to live to further His kingdom. I need to be vocal about my faith – to strangers and to people I love.  I have wrestled with the fear of losing friendships if I try talking about eternity and salvation through Christ with friends-- I have been afraid that they would be agitated or offended, and start avoiding me.  But that book I mentioned in an earlier post “One Thing You Can’t Do In Heaven,” made a great point: "If you are not eternal friends, are you really friends at all?"  I realize that if I truly care for a non-christian friend, my number one priority needs to be to one day see them in heaven.

I am preparing for some upcoming opportunities to share my faith with nonbelievers whom I care deeply about.  Please pray for me that I will have the courage to step out of my comfort zone and trust that the Lord will give me the words to say and demeanor to say them in. 

K thanks for reading.  Grace and peace♥

Father let my heart be after you♥

Amazing song. "Garden" by Needtobreathe

beautiful dance

Why is it that when I am tired, I turn to television for rest?  Yesterday, I was falling asleep at work.  When I got home, I planted myself on the couch and watched the BRAVO channel for about 2 hours.  In the back of my mind, I kept telling myself that I needed to turn the TV off and spend time in His word and in prayer.  And yet, I justified that I was too exhausted to do anything but basically turn my brain off and waste away on the couch.  As I crawled into bed, I lay there feeling like I failed.  Like Christ was trying to remind me of and nail down His message of "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest" (Matthew 11:28), and I was ignoring it all day. 

One thing I really struggle with and allowing my relationship with the Lord to be a relationship, and not a task.  My heart longs to draw closer and closer to Him, to have him open my heart and eyes and transform me.  But my type-A personallity takes it so far as to make me feel inadequate if I don't invest enough time into reading His word and praying each day.  And that leads to tension and anxiety related to growing in faith.  That's not how it is supposed to be!  I know that.  Pray for me that the Lord can break down my type-A walls so that our relationship is more of a beauitful dance and not an overwhelming assignment or burden of unmet expectations.

K thanks for reading.  Grace and peace♥

And this is how it all started ...

My brother recently recommended a book to me, "One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven" by Mark Cahill.  It kinda rocked my world.  It left me with a whirlwind of thoughts -- trying to figure out how I fall short as a Christian, and what I can do in order to fulfill Christ's purpose for my life.  What I find is that in this world that we live in, I have struggled to truly and deeply care enough to seek out what God's absolute calling is for me.  I was too content with just being a typical Christian -- the kind that goes to church, isn't caught up in drinking or partying, but is lukewarm and only half heartedly committing my life to Him.  I have always felt like devotions were more of a thing to check off ... like a task that only needed 20 minutes in the morning, and then it was on to "more important" things throughout the rest of the day.  And then I came across this ...


Revelation 3:15-16
15I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot. I wish you were either one or the other! 16So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth.
That verse REALLY got me thinking.  And as my brother Ben put it, "All I know is that I am not going to leave myself anywhere close to the lukewarm line."  So what does this mean?  What does it take to not be lukewarm?  How can I achieve it? 


That's kinda where I am at now ...
... searching for understanding.  Desiring to know what the next step is.  Longing for a major transformation in my life.


K thanks for reading.  Grace and peace♥